Liberty Jail

I want to take a moment to express a little bit of a more serious comment than the last post. I taught the lesson on Sunday which focused on Joseph Smith in Liberty Jail. Whoever named the jail that was playing one sick joke. Having grown up in the church, I have been quite familiar with the story of Joseph going to Liberty and it was hard for him. Due to some changes this year, I more fully comprehend (or realize I can't comprehend) the magnitude of his suffering. It wasn't until this time did he turn to the Lord and say in essence: where did you go? Yet, he always knew he'd be delivered. May I also mention I have never seen such powerful statements made by a man who had very little formal education. Incredible. During the lesson, I realized I could relate to Joseph because of my own experiences this year. Not that I was physically imprisoned, but certainly felt emotional tied and physically demanded to do more than I thought was capable. In my studying I saw Joseph suffer for his own circumstances and also for the people who he couldn't be there to strengthen. I can't imagine being a leader of a group of people, and listen to their expressions of pain as they were driven from their homes, yet again and not be able to do anything about it. At least in the past, Joseph was able to comfort his people by being there, preaching doctrine, and physically healing the sick. Not this time. The whole situation was horrible in every sense of the word. He saw his wife three times in the 5 plus months he was there. Interestingly enough, Sidney Rigdon was freed but chose to stay inside the prison because the persecutions were so great that the prison became a security for him. I never knew that. Point being, I began to recognize this year was in a small sense my own Liberty Jail. I learned to whom I needed to look for strength, and found comfort in my Savior. I learned it was ok to express I was struggling, but not to focus on it. I learned trials are for our benefit IF we allow them to be. I can see now I learned more this year than I could have anywhere else. Looking back on this year (and counting down the days until this year is over) I have seen changes that are so drastic they may not be able to be measured. I never thought I'd say this, but I am grateful for this year. The Lord allowed great challenges to come to me and I learned I am a lot stronger than I thought I was. I can do hard things. We also studied spiritual gifts yesterday and I feel like I was given some great spiritual gifts to be successful this school year. I am so grateful for examples of people who have gone before to show me how I want to live my life.